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One month has already passed in my year of zen so here is how it went:

– Happiness Jar: I have to put a note in it every day of what made me happy. I’ve been doing well so far, I put something in it every day although sometimes only the next morning/evening

– Gratitude: finding 10 things a day to be grateful for. Challenging but I think I only had 2 days when I couldn’t find 10 mostly because I was too tired to keep thinking. (Plus one day when I just fell asleep but I had the 10 when I woke up around 2am). As for feeling grateful, it doesn’t always happen but I certainly see an improvement there. At the beginning I just kept repeating the 10 things go like a mantra every evening without being really grateful but by now it happens more and more often I’m really grateful for little things like having a full cupboard or having fresh water or the friends I have or the love I get from cats. You know, all the little things we take for granted every day in our lives.

– Mindfulness: eeerm, a lot to improve on it. Mainly the last week and a half I’m very emotional and overwhelmed. There’s anger in me I can’t let go of yet and bitterness. 

– Yoga: it started all well, I signed up for Wanderlust’s 21 day yoga challenge but halfway through I was told not to put any weight on my right shoulder because of a strained muscle and since then I’m struggling. I do stretches but my flow does not exist because I keep stopping. I know it’s possible to do a yoga flow without putting weight on your arms but I haven’t quite found mine yet

– 7 a day: most days I have at least 5-6 portions of vegetables and fruits but 7 is a challenge. However some days I go up to 8 or 9. The one thing I just realised a couple of days ago is that instead of replacing my usual daytime snacks I keep eating them AND the fruits and vegetables as well. So I gained some weight. And honestly, I felt so full by mid afternoon that I didn’t want to eat anymore. I think that’s why I didn’t quite manage 7 a days. So from now on I try to pay more attention to this. Prioritising healthy snacks over less healthier snacks (still not superbad snacks mostly though)

Binge eating and mental health: slow improvements. My counsellor thinks I might have borderline personality disorder freaked me out at first because I was in denial about the seriousness of my condition (I’m still in denial…) but it’s slowly settling in. I’m waiting for another consultation so we’ll see what happens but to get better overall I pretty much have to keep going on the path I’ve started this year: gratitude, mindfulness, yoga, relax, meditation, taking things slowly… As for binge eating, I only had one major one which is last night. But even this was far more moderate than what I had last year and instead of getting back to normal eating like nothing happened I actually feel really full. And I don’t really feel guilty about it either which I think is a good thing.

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