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It’s been an interesting week. I had a lot of talk about friendships, relationships, connections.
We interact with many people in our lives and real friendships are hard to find.
I’m lucky I have 6 real, strong friends in my inner circle, close to my heart. It’s quite an international bunch now though: 2 in Hungary, 1 in Austria, 1 in Australia, 1 in Sweden and 1 in Dubai. Most of them I’ve known for years.
Friendship is a fragile balance of love, caring and appreciation. Both giving and receiving. No one is more important or better than the other.
For a long time I didn’t give, and I only received but not a lot. I was rather detached. Then I started giving and I didn’t ask for anything in return. Then I saw people just wasted it. Now I only give to those who deserve it. Who fight, who take action, who cares, who loves, who appreciates, who pays attention. And they return the gifts I give them. They’re all amazing and wonderful people and I’m truly blessed to have them in my life. My gifts are valuable enough not to be wasted.  Friendship, caring, love, loyalty and support. They’re my fortresses and I am theirs and I’m willing to make sacrifices if needed but they don’t require it.
Every time I meet someone new they have the opportunity to be in my most inner circle but the moment I see my gifts are wasted, not appreciated, taken for granted and we’re not in balance I retreat. I give less and I don’t accept. It doesn’t mean I fall out it with them. It just means I don’t let them close to my heart. I won’t take extra steps to care for them. Neither do I ask. And I feel that in balance.
It might not be the pure good and perfectionism but that’s how I feel. My friendship is valuable. I only give it to those who prove to be worthy but once they have, they have it for life.
During the years you loose a lot of people. They either pass away or you just part ways but those who are the closest to you will always be by your side accepting and supporting your choices and ready to catch you when you fall. And you do the same for them. I am them and they’re me. We are equal.
When you just give and give and care and you get nothing or barely anything back, that relationship is not in balance and it’s time to let them go. They’re not worth to get the most precious gems of your heart. They’re just not the ones to bring balance in your life and they’re not the ones you can give balance either.

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