I had a rubbish week. My sister’s mum’s death and then I was unexpectedly told I would move out in a month and work was very stressed, house – hunting,  meeting new people, placing an ad to find the room and not being able to do any workout. It all stresses me put and frustrated me and I couldn’t handle it at all. I was binge eating and bot sleeping well and I felt exhausted, etc. And I had disturbing thoughts. I couldn’t help but thinking. Thought -tornado.
The room I viewed on Thursday wasn’t good, the guy I met was somewhat OK but I wasn’t 100% convinced I’d be happy to move in with him. But my hairdresser somewhat saved the day when she offered her couch in case I wouldn’t find anything.
The first ad I saw was from a girl who works a lot, loves yoga, owns cats and is looking for a quite housemate. I emailed her and we were texting all week until last night I viewed the room. I was very excited and I had good feelings about it. And something changed in me. I felt to do some shopping. I bought two dresses. One of them is the usual black and white. The other is burgundy. I didn’t need them. It felt good to buy them, I felt I deserved them. I haven’t really bought new things for a year because I didn’t feel worthy. I didn’t really care what I wore. I just got on, being pretty, I was on with old clothes I bought like 2 years ago. And now I have new ones. It’s not the fact I have new clothes but the fact I feel good about them makes the difference. It’s definitely a step up. I’d say I’m on step 20 towards being happy. A thousand steps for happiness. 980 more to go. šŸ™‚



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